THE ENGAGEMENT: 05.07.2004
Introduction:If ever a story needs two voices, this is it. Our stories are intertwined in the passages below. Shane's words are separated through a unique font and lighter color, while mine remain unchanged.
What was supposed to be a casual Friday evening resulted in what I'm sure I'll remember as one of the most special nights of my life.
Back in early February, I made the first trip to start looking at rings. After an hour in a pretty well known Bay Area jewelry store, I was completely overwhelmed. It was certainly going to be harder than I expected.
Around the time of all of this 'looking', Ava and I decided to finally book a trip to Maui. The timing was working out. If I could find a stone and have the ring made in time, I would propose while we were on vacation.
I wanted something that would surprise her and also let her know how special she is. At one point, I promised her I wouldn't propose to her in a restaurant. I wasn't sure if this promise extended to dinner, so I decided on a proposal on the beach at sunset.
Thinking back, I suppose, the whole morning was a metaphor for what was, and perhaps is, to come. It was a combination of fears and firsts, with a teeny dash of nausea but in the end a lot of fun!
We woke up early to catch a boat out of Maalaia bay, and not just any boat - a dive boat. For those who know me well, you know that this mixes two of my most uncomfortable subjects - deep water and moving objects. For starters, although I love being around water, I hate being in it further than where my feet touch the ground. I'm not a strong swimmer, I hate water up my nose, and I don't enjoy being part of any food-chain. All these things make for a non-diving participant.
Second, I have never been on a boat in open waters before so I spent a good hour communing with my body making sure that my breakfast didn't make a run for shore. Upon arrival of Molokini, however, and seeing everyone (including their grandmas) enter the waters I mustered enough courage to get into a wet suit and waddle down into the water. When you have never snorkeled before the first breaths are always shallow and nervous, but the fish made it better. I saw some Angelfish, swam amongst Trigger fish and saw a pair of Yellow Tang chase one another. In the end, despite the fear the experience was certainly worth it!
I had picked the second night of our vacation because I knew I wouldn't want to have the ring and have the anxiety of the proposal during the majority of the trip.
All the planning was done and Friday arrived. I had to slip away a few times in the afternoon in order to confirm the dinner and the limo. Ava got a craving for lobster and picked a restaurant for dinner, Nick's Fishmarket. In order for her to stay calm, I told her I was able to get dinner reservations for 6:45 pm; the same time I had already planned for dinner.
As we were getting ready for dinner, I slipped out again to call Ava's parents. I was hoping I could catch them at home to let them know about my plans. Sure enough, they were both home and I was able to let them know what was in the works. I'm glad neither had any objections :)
Our evening plans included what I assumed would be a whimsical walk on the beach and what I thought was dinner at Nick's. Our condo is across the street from Charley Young beach, which is where we planned to watch the sunset. As we walked down to the shores it was hard to miss the limo parked outside. I had two thoughts at this time: prom stopover or some guy proposing to his girlfriend - either would have been amusing to watch.
We walked across the street to the beach for the beginning stages of sunset. The limo was already there. I tried to ignore it and act normal, which got harder and harder as we got closer to the beach. I wasn't quite sure what to say or how to start it.
As we found an empty spot that we could claim, Shane's behavior became a little… well… funny. He brought up tiny fragments of our time together all leading to him reaching into his pocket for a beautiful ring and asking me to spend my life with him.
The tide was coming in so there wasn't much sand to walk on, so we found a little overlook that faced the sunset. After a few minutes of awkward conversation, I could tell she could tell something was strange. So I just came out and asked her - honestly I don't really remember exactly what I said. And I think she may have thought I was kidding a bit, until I showed her the ring. The feeling was great!! Relief from the anxiety of the afternoon, Happiness about the future. Excitement about the rest of the surprise evening.
I remember questioning if he was really asking, and then if he was really serious. I wish I could tell you that I then said something witty, but to be honest I don't remember my first words… or my second. I do remember feeling overwhelmed and happy and just wanting to bury my face in his shoulder while I gathered myself.
So one of my assumptions was right - the limo was for a guy proposing to his girlfriend - I just didn't expect that I would get a ring-side seat at the proposal and that the girlfriend would be me.
We got in the limo and I broke the news that she wasn't getting lobster for dinner. She decided to just have the rest of the evening revealed as it happened.
Our driver began our journey to dinner - it wasn't to Nick's. It was better! The car drove through the greenery of Wailea until it turned into a tight driveway. I was curious what kind of hotel maintained such narrow streets until the car stopped and it was all made clear. As I walked out and looked on ahead I saw a single table placed on the peak of a hill overlooking the ocean. Two tikki torches burned alongside as a private chef was waiting for us to arrive. We had a privately catered beach-side dinner for two at an amazing view observing the sunset. It truly felt special!
The limo ride was only a quick 10 minutes to Wailea, which is a beautiful area of South Maui filled with extremely nice resorts. We turned into a small road that led to Ulua Beach. As the limo pulled up to the end of the road, Ava could see the small table for two up on a grassy hill overlooking the beach. I'm not sure but she may have stopped breathing for a second as she said "You really didn't have to do this." Which was exactly why I wanted to!
Our dinner was wonderful - we had three full courses (ahi sashimi, a tender fillet and two desert courses of bananas foster and chocolate/raspberry crepes) all of which battled for room with the butterflies in my stomach.
Chef Mike served the bottle of wine and started on the first course of tuna sashimi and Hawaiian crab cakes. Between courses we took a quick walk down the beach. Then the main course was served shortly after the sun set. With tiki torches glowing and stars shining, it was a fantastic dinner.
The night came to a close early - between the time difference, our active morning and the purely emotional evening, being home by 9 sounded like heaven.
In the days since we've made our rounds calling our immediate families with the news. The rest of you now find out together! It's just been nice having something for a while that's just ours.
The next big question has already been asked (When's the date?) We are now revising our "When are you guys going to get engaged?" responses. So if you hear things like: "We're still negotiating the dowry", or "When he signs off on the pre-nup", please realize we're going to take some time to figure it out. Right now it just feels good to be where we are before diving into the stress of wedding planning.
